I'm Retired! Now what?

May 28, 2026

Over the years I’ve heard when people get older, they’re supposed to appreciate the warmer weather more.  Well, I guess I haven’t hit that level of elder status yet because I still hate hot weather, and even though spring is still in full swing, the outside temperature in north Texas is pushing the ninety-degree mark.  With that in mind, I was looking for something cool to do, and I mean really cool.  Cool like an ice hockey game!

In north Texas the Dallas Stars still reign as the primo hockey team, but they were done for the season, and besides, who can afford those jacked up NHL ticket prices anyway?  Instead, I opted for the more wallet friendly Allen Americans hockey!  I’ve always been a sucker for minor league sports anyway.  This might be because I grew up in a small town where everything was kind of minor league.  Besides, I’ve always felt the need to support those guys who are out there living on Roman Noodles and driving the same car they drove in high school while fighting for that big break that will launch them up into the majors!  In all reality, whether professional athletes are barely scraping by in the minors or making boo koo bucks in the majors, I think they are all pretty fortunate to get paid for playing a freaking game!

Allen, Texas is a northern suburb of Dallas, and I can generally zip right to arena without having to deal with all the headaches of Dallas traffic.  I had already been to one Allen American game this season, but my mighty Americans were in the freaking playoffs!  So with a mighty hockey yell (whatever that might be), I made the forty-five-minute drive down to Allen to cheer on the local team and do a lot of staring in confusion because to be quite honest, I only understand one or two of the rules concerning hockey.  For the most part, the guys are skating around on ice with big sticks, and they are trying to hit a little puck thing into a net with these big sticks.  And the other team is trying to hit the little puck thing into a net with their big sticks as well, and the team that hits the little puck into the net with their big sticks the most times wins…right?  Okay, I think that’s all a fan really has to understand.

I’ve probably seen at least thirty hockey games in my life, but I still don’t understand the rule of icing.  Isn’t that something you do to a cake?  And what about all the offsides penalties?  There’s no freaking line of scrimmage in hockey so how can someone be offsides?  Okay, don’t try to confuse hockey with football.  I just enjoy the fact that these guys can do all this slamming, banging, and slashing on ice skates.  For someone who was never able to master the art of roller skating, I can only sit and watch in awe!

As mentioned before, this was all within the excitement of playoff hockey!  Well, kind of anyway.  The Americans were down 0 to 3 games in the best of a 7 game playoff series.  In other words, if I wanted to see a hockey game, I figured that I’d best go to this one because the season’s outcome was looking pretty dismal for my team.  Regardless of the American’s bleak future, I was all excited because the team’s website claimed if I showed up early, I’d get some cool, red towel thing to wave around.

When I walked into the arena my eyes were quickly drawn to the team’s dancers who were decked out in their tight, little outfits and greeting the fans while handing out the towels.  Although they seemed to be talking to everyone as well as posing for a few photos, they seemed to have no interest in handing one of the souvenir, red towels to me.  I even stood around waiting for them to offer me one, but they just shot me a glance as if I was some creepy, old stalker.  I finally picked one of the blessed towels off the floor that had been knocked off their table.  No one called security on me, so I guess I was good.

To be honest, I didn’t even know who the Americans were playing in the series, but I soon discovered they were battling against the Kansas City Mavericks during this playoff run.  I mainly realized this when a couple and their little girl settled in next to me decked out in their vibrant, Kansas City Mavericks orange.  That stood out in the crowd because at American games every one is “Living in the Red” as the team’s fight song says.  Indeed, I was wearing a red shirt to support the hometown team.  It was a red Chaps golf shirt, but red none the less.

These dedicated fans had traveled all the way from Kansas City to Dallas to enjoy a little minor league hockey action.  Although I had to respect their devotion, I also had to asked the question of, “Why?”  With the dismal looking future of the Allen Americans I could only guess that this series was not going to end well for the home team, thus meaning their Mavericks were going to survive to battle on in the playoffs.  This of course meant there would be more home game in Kansas City.  And after looking at Ticketmaster, I learned that the tickets in Kansas City are twenty dollars less than the tickets in Allen!  Unless the happy family just wanted to get out of town for the weekend, I was questioning their sanity.

I only hope that the family had a great weekend in Big D!  Their hockey team certainly did.  The American’s put up a valiant fight, and the guys in red even had the game tied up 2 to 2 with only one minute left in the second period.  However, when a team allows two goals to be scored on them in the last minute of the second period there is usually nothing waiting for them in the third period but doom, gloom, despair, and agony!

The couple’s little girl seemed to be having a great time at the game and joined in with all the cheers…for the Americans!  When the home team scored their first goal the little girl let out a squeal of excitement with everyone seated around her.  Her poor parents tried to inform her that she was cheering for the wrong team, but by the third period they didn’t seem to care who she was cheering for as long as she was happy.  The crowd around me seemed to be yelling at the officials far more than cheering for their team, and I almost expected the little girl to join in with the ever so popular chant of, “Ref you suck!”  Unfortunately, I don’t understand the rules of hockey well enough to know if the referees actually sucked or not.  I just sat there peacefully with my red towel.  All I know is if the puck goes into the net, that’s a good thing. Well, the puck didn’t go into the net enough times for the Allen Americans, and they got swept by the Kansas City Mavericks with a 5 to 3 defeat.  The happy family could now return to Kansas City in hockey jubilance and watch their minor league team take on the Ft. Wayne Komets in the next round.  As for the Allen Americans?  See you in October guys!